Archive for July 18th, 2006

Hello From The Abyss

Tuesday, July 18th, 2006

Hi all. Yep, I’m still here and I’ve finally decided to update. And boy howdy, is there some updatin’ ta do, I tell ya whut. So much so that it may take a few (dozen) entries to get it all caught up.

I know you’ve all heard the excuses about being busy and having a life and all that. But in this case, “busy” doesn’t exactly seem to cover it. Basically, my life has resembled the inside of a blender for several months (and not in a good way), and it’s just now settling down from Puree to Stir.

Beau Hunk and I have come to realize that we have yet to have a moment of peace in our marriage. By “peace” I mean a stretch of time where some big fucking trauma-drama wasn’t hanging over our heads and threatening to change our lives in major ways. But we think we may be coming to the end of that dark dark tunnel and may be actually glimpsing a bit of light. Let’s hope it’s not a train, shall we?

I only say that in half-jest, because life really has been shitting on us lately. At least that’s the way it feels. In spite of some set-backs and a string of bad news (most of which I will not discuss), we are finding our silver linings and making the best of situations.

For instance, one of these changes has made it possible for me to dedicate more time to school in the fall. I will be taking five classes (14 units), which ought to keep me plenty busy. Oh, and for those of you who were kind enough to ask, I finished the spring semester with flying colors: A’s in Family Law and Legal Research and Writing, and a B in Introduction to Paralegalism. My Intro instructor told me “a B in this class is like an A in any other class”. Yeah, right. Tell that to my GPA. Believe me when I say he doesn’t give A’s. He’s very much the hardass.

I took a class over the summer via internet – Computer Literacy Workshop. It’s required for my degree, and a total fucking joke. Basically, the class is teaching shit that is so fucking irrelevant to actually using a computer in any sort of business environment that it’s useless. Those who know computers are learning shit they don’t care about, and those who don’t know computers are learning shit they will never use. The class requires the purchase of Microsoft Office Professional to cover the use of Access. But the chapter on Access is only a week long and you are not even required to turn in any assignments. So exactly why are you making these poor college students spend this money for something they aren’t learning how to use anyway? It’s a clusterfuck. Luckily, I had the program anyway, so my bitch is solely on behalf of the rest of the world.

Bitching aside, I finished the class two weeks ahead of schedule and finished with a score of 458 out of 433. No, that’s not a typo. The bulk of the scores came from online assessments that were written by the book publisher. These assessments were so full of bullshit questions with “right” answers that were either nonsensical or downright wrong, that the instructor decided to declare 32 out of 40 questions right to be 100%. I only got the answers right because I figured out that you could take the pre-test (that tells you the right answer) five or six times and learn how the questions should be answered, so when I took the real test, I could score well. That’s how I ended up scoring 105.77% in the class.

This fall I’m taking three legal classes – Real Estate, Civil Procedures and Litigation, and Contracts / Employment. I’m taking two general ed classes – Nutrition and the Local History of [our] County. Since I’m relatively new to the area, I’m really looking forward to the history class. The Contracts / Employment law class is being taught by the same instructor whom I had for Introduction to Paralegalism. He’s one of the top 10 contract instructors in the country, and he’s already told me I should be ready to work my ass off for the class. Real Estate and Civil Procedures is being taught by the same instructor I had for Family Law, so there’s another known quantity. Even better, I like her.

Unfortunately, there is a major hurdle between me and school. It has to do with my health, and like everything else in the last ten months, it came out of the blue, shit on my head and refuses to be simple. Lucky for you (or not), this is one situation that you’ll be hearing lots about in the next few days. But this entry is long enough, so it’s getting it’s own post in the very near future.